haiz. finally something is settled. felt a sense of relief.. i juz hope dat e same problem wld not occur again.. but sometimes is a little hard for someone like me to tink lesser.. wld try to look on the positive side.. hopefully everyding wld reli be fine..

got my ITP letter liao... i kena posted to a company at Beach Road call Bates Singapore Pte Ltd.. the pay wasnt stated on the letter.. but bery sad.. coz the working hr is so damn long~~~ 9am-6pm leh... wah biang eh~ 9hours lor.. dat means during my attachment i cannt work at KFC liao.. nabehz~ still tot can earn $$ from both sides.. haiz. sian~sibeh sad.. now juz hope e pay is good lor.. hope can tio $800.. hahaha.. at least $700 lah~ holiday leh.. if no earn alot sch reopen how i be model student? oh.. den jialart liao.. my driving test on 17th of May.. attachment ends at 22nd.. dat means confirm 17th i nd to take MC.. shit man~ den i where got time go for driving lesson??? haiz.................. sian sian...

haiz. this coming friday going for the briefing of tis ITP.. hopefully, pray hard, god bless, i can get a good good pay....

k lah.. nothing else to say liao.. i need to thanks all the frens who have been there for mi when i'm down.. "kam xia..."

haiz. i reli duno how to blog.. duno how to say... duno how to type.. sometimes dings r like dat.. so difficult to say out.. so difficult to settle.. i reli duno wat to do and how to do.. in mi there is so much to tell.. so much to say.. but i dun have a chance to say it out... in here, i reli duno how to phrase it out.. there is so much i want to tell.. so much i 1 2 let go.. argh~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.... life is so fuckup.. so much to bother.. so much to trouble.. so much to tink off..

haiz. actually i login is to type abt wat i feel and how i feel.. but now i reli duno how to everyding out.................

few days didnt blog.. too busy.. i hit debarment for Audit.. but they gave mi 1 more chance.. though i do feel abit buay song, still i nd to accept it.. dun care lah~ no debar can liao.. y buay song leh? coz i rmb i was onli marked absence thrice lor.. den another 1 more time duno come fr where.. dat tutor idiot 1 lah.. i'm not e onli student kena.. my fren's fren oso kena lor~

tis few days dun reli have enuff slp.. on thurs nite i went for mahjong session at my fren's hse.. enjoyed myself.. haha.. starting keep on losing man.. lucky after a few hrs of losing my luck came back.. won back my capital.. overall won $2.70.. haha.. not even enuff to offset my cab fare man.. but nvm lah.. it's e enjoyment i got dat counts.. not e amt i won..

ytd i attached to TPY(toa payoh).. there quite busy lah.. but still ok~ not as scary.. got enuff staff den u can run e shift bery well.. after dat went for coffee session wid donna and sulin(my colleague).. Donna nd to go back run shift at TPYE.. so mi and sulin went to TPYE there tok tok.. tok and tok.. tok until quite late.. until TPYE closed.. until donna finished her paperwork.. until rain.. until rain gone.. until midnite.. Donna left at 12am coz she had a mahjong session wid her sis-in-law.. mi and sulin contiune staying.. wat did we tok? <-- secret.. hahaha..

overall.. now we both koe something.. ppl tend to protect demself.. coz dey r scare of being hurt.. no wrong doing dat.. but when we do dat..we r actually hurting ppl unknowningly instead of protecting those we care the most for us..

haiz.. sad cases r always around us.. juz cherish those dat we reli shld so dat we wun live wid regrets.. ... .... ......

Juz reached home.. so tired.. skipped my tax tutorial again.. 3rd time. hahaha.. so cannt skip anymore liao.. but nvm lah.. exam coming liao = end of semester..

today slp until 2pm+.. my cleaner nv come today.. LL, need to wash myself.. haiz. Luckily one of my staff kenny stayed back to help me.. he was working morning... but he stayed till nite.. finished my paperwork at 9.55pm.. record of mine.. lolz~ den started washing all those bloody stuff.. finally.. finish washing at 12.15am.. consider quite fast le bah~ den went to supper wid him and Monique(one of my colleague).. eat until 2am+ den go home.. datz y so late den online.. y dun1 slp leh? coz i tml 9am lesson.. cannt be late somemore.. got presentation.. havent prepared my speech oso.. so i intending not to slp liao.. tml after e presentation eat finish den go library slp until my 3pm lesson starts..

so sian man.. tis few days always have e tinking of "who r those fren who wld reli standby mi when i need dem?" & "who i can rely on when i need companion.." i reli duno e ans for these 2 qns.. haiz. tink too much is not a good ding.. i dun like to tink too much oso.. but datz my character.. i tend to do lots and lots of thinking when i'm alone.. when i have something to do or when i am wid my frens.. i wun tink so much abt those sad cases.. datz y i always appear happy and cheerful infront of all my frens.. i reli wish to koe e ans for dat 2 qns.. but sad to say.. i tink i will nv koe it until e day come or something big reli happen.. i've got assurance from 1 of my fren.. she said wld always be there for mi.. i trust her. I knew she wld not break her promise.. but of coz, i have more than 1 close fren.. how abt dem?

i dun expect any return for giving in to a frenship.. but of coz no one wish to be treated as nothing by anyone when u put in so much efforts to build a frenship.. frenship is reli bery fragile.. dings r not as easy as we see.. humans too.. sometimes humans r so hypocrite.. so difficult to understand.. when u tot dat u reli understand a person but when u heard wat others say.. u wld realise u r wrong.. perhaps i'm rite lah coz wat ppl says mite not be true oso.. juz hope lor.. hope i wun end up being an idiot.

Donna and Sulin want to have a mahjong session tml.. but cant find 1 more "leg".. but we dun mind play "sa ka" lah.. hopefully this time round we can reli have our mahjong session.. coz after this week, i mite be bery busy liao.. exam coming, i reli wish to score well tis semester.. for e past 3 semester in poly, i had been slacking all e way.. feel abit disappointed by myself.. y i turn out to be like daT? when have i become so hack care abt my result? i set high expectation for myself.. but now? haiz......i always tell myself to work hard in the coming semester.. on e other hand, i always ended up breaking my own promise.. i nv break my promise made to anyone.. but i always break promises made to myself..

k lah.. nothing else to say and complain liao.. time to work on my presentation speech.. blog another day.. bye~

suddenly starts to wonder how long wld i be able to live in this world.. life is so unpredictable.. sometimes it's reli bery hard for mi not to tink abt anyding.. reli bery hard..

for e past few days i didnt blog coz i lazy to come online.. so sian man~ duno wat to say.. everyday nd to say abt sad sad ding.. wat for say? sometimes i find myself bery boliao.. bery no life.. bery no fren.. bery no mood... bery no ... no... no............ know nothing of wat i want in life.. y says dat? it's becoz of wat i did, treatments i received fr people makes mi feels it.. wat happened? dun ask me.. i dun feel like saying it out here..

exams r coming soon.. i shld be getting into some mood to study.. i kept on promise myself to study hard for e coming test... coming exam... coming semester.. but i always end up breaking those promises.. i reli lack of self-discipline.. tink i reli nd to work lesser liao.. muz concentrate more on my studies.. but study too early oso no good.. sekali i study until so "xin ku" den suddenly die no need go exam how? haha.. den i "white white" study liao lor..

k lah.. blog till here.. time to find my audit answer liao.. tml nd to present audit tutorial.. so sian.. hopefully e stack of notes bao gave me got e ans i wan inside.. if nt i sad case liao..

sian.. tis few days i reli feeling bery sian.. so troubled.. so low morale.. so upset.. so unhappy.. so discouraged.. so demoralised.. so sad... so sian.. so tired(mentally)...

today junyao came down to store.. but onli for awhile to return his uniform.. he told mi dat he's still schooling.. but i kind of dun believe.. coz he dyed his hair.. i doubt his hair colour is allowed in his sch bah..

treat most of my staff eat today.. feel dat dey shld get some reward becoz dey are always willing to help e store work full shift.. work 6days per week.. though dey get those OT pay.. some appreciation shld oso be shown rite? i'm a staff b4.. i koe how dey feel.. it's good when ppl appreciate u..

still tinking whether to go for donna's housewarming on tis sat anot.. working till 9pm.. i koe she wanted mi to be there alot.. but... i scare after wk i tired... den reach her place alrdy so late.. how long can i stay there? haiz.. duno lah..

ok lah.. juz blog until here.. tml driving lesson at 7am.. later cannot wake up.. lucky my project discussion changed to wed.. if nt i now still nd to do ppt slides for my project..

byebye.. goodniteX...

suddenly feel so sian.. so moralised.. i passed all my 6 modules. 2 of it r borderline passes.. nothing to be sad coz i deserved it.. i always last min..

actually today i wanted to go and shop for wallet again.. i wanted to sms pgk.. she's doing morning.. but i didnt.. maybe she nd to rush home after wk? end up i sms-ed lingzhi.. sad case.. she said she dun1 2 go out after sch.. den i decided to sms pgk.. try my luck.. but she's wid shumin.. den i sms-ed donna.. she wasnt working.. sms junyao ask him go play pool nv reply until juz now.. by e time i got home liao.. haiz...
haiz............................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................

sian.. life is sort of meaningless for me.. i wonder watz e purpose of mi living in tis world.. live in tis world to feel upset? to be sad? to be unhappy? to force myself to be optimistic when i'm actually not? Zzzz...

on my way home fr sch.. i starts to wonder how many frens i have.. who r true who r not.. who r those worth my keeping who dun.. i tried my best to give in to all my frens.. tried my best to help dem.. all tis ding i had done, does it worth? i doubt there will b any answer.. onli god knows bah....

ALL OF YOU OUT THERE!! how much do your koe abt mi? Miss Png is wat kind of person? do ur koe? .................